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Arsene Wenger’s ode to disappointed love

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Two nights ago, after the Arsenal-United match, Arsene Wenger got all wistful during the post-match interview, explaining that the barracking the Arsenal fans gave former Gunners captain Robin van Persie was because:

They loved him. So today is a bit of disappointed love.

How romantic. Well, inches and inches of columns have already been written analyzing, dissecting, and critiquing the match, as well as the two teams’ performance. So, instead of adding to that, I decided to imagine Arsene crooning to the tunes of Las Vegas by Tony Christie, as he laments his disappointed love.

For the uninitiated, the relatively young, or those who simply did not have the good fortune of a childhood spent listening to Tony Christie (thanks, Pa), he was one of the masters of the “lovelorn” genre – perfect for the heartbroken and jilted. So, hit the link, pretend you’re a devastated Arsene, and sing along! I’ve (incredibly creatively) entitled this one “Disappointed Love”.

Disappointed Love

The Emirates, he spent eight years at
Then Sir Alex came, and stole him
 
Ohhh, van Persie
You left a year ago
For the Devils
Now we’re bereft o’ goals
With disappointed love!
 
Ohhh, van Persie
The cups ain’t comin’ in
The fans they say
“Why must Wenger stay?!”
It’s disappointed love!
 
(chorus)
Hey van Persie
Why did I ever sell you?
Year after year, you could’ve helped us rule
Hey van Persie
Can any ‘keeper stop you?
All I have now, is Olivier Giroud!
 
One spring evenin’
T’was your grand home-comin’
Sagna fouled you
You hit the ball so true
Szczesny was left askew!
 
Ohhh, van Persie
You were mine a year ago
What did I do?
I lost a-hold o’ you
Such disappointed love!
 
(chorus)
Hey van Persie
Why did I let go of you?
Now a Devil, you’re winning the title
Hey van Persie
Oh, how I could do with you
‘Cos now these days, I might just be replaced
 
(chorus)
Hey van Persie
Oh, how I could do with you
One of these days, I might just be replaced
.
.
For now these days, we aim for just third place
For now these days, we aim for just third place

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